Grapefruit Love

Instead of going through Facebook, which is full of all those horrible (to lonely me) Mother's Day posts, I'll share with you what I was thinking about today (and I see this is kinda' a continuation of the last post, although not about elephants).

I'm still making my way through the piles of left-over Pesach produce, so I brought in a grapefruit for lunch.  I love grapefruit, but they are such a mess to eat bare-handed.  I was reminded of the most romantic thing anyone ever did for me: when my college boyfriend would peel the membrane off grapefruit sections for me, unasked, just because he knew I would like it. 

It is hard to explain what makes for a beautiful gift.  But certainly the price, and even the effort are not necessarily the major factor.  Mostly, it's the reflected message "I know you, you are meaningful to me."

Happy May 12.

Ode to a Promiscuous Pachyderm

This is a public mash-letter, to one of the most important people in my life:

I was recently sent a short article, "Attachment and Connection" by Dr. Bruce Perry.  Dr. perry writes that that we can plot development of personal attachment (such as that between parent and child) into six distinct stages:  Proximity, Sameness, Belonging or Loyalty, Significance, Love, and Being Known.  I don't really have time or energy to elucidate here, but I think it is pretty clear even as just this list.  I reacted very stronly to the article, thinking about the amazing attachments I have to a select few people in my life, those who cross the boundary into Significance, Love, and even Being Known.

It is a terrible sorrow to feel that there is no one who knows YOU, it was a very large part of the depression that held me, that I still often fall in;  It is a tremendous joy to be with share with another, and feel "known." 

So to you who makes me feel significant, loved, and known, I give you the name Little Miss Inside.  It is not a perfect name, because it doesn't seem to include Little Miss Bubbly, Little Miss Kindness, Little Miss So Cute, Little Miss Popular; and Emunah is already taken.  But somehow this bubbly, kind, so cute, popular little miss invited me inside.  You are rich in attachment already, but here is another who hopes you understand how deeply you are significant, beloved, and (I hope) known.

But don't be upset if I sometimes slip back to Little Miss Slutty Elephant.