So my mother has been asking what I want for chanukkah, and what the kids would want. My mother and I have completely opposite tastes, and I have generally asked her not to get me anything for the past few years. This past year I could say it outright, with the "explanation," I have NO ROOM, please don't get me anything, just get consumables for the kids. So now, she sends me money - which is worse than nothing, in my mind. I end up just putting it in my purse and spending it on groceries or whatever, and have to fudge to her about some fun way I spent it.
So I was looking at the housewares catalog I got yesterday, thinking what stuff would make a good gift to request. My mother's senior center often goes out to places with housewares stores, and Mom really likes to shop there, so if I can, I try to request some goof-proof kithchen item. But here is (one of) the reasons we can't make each other happy with gifts. I would overwhelmingly prefer a gift of $30 gloves or scarf than a $30 coat (or a $30 knife to a $30 food processor). A $30 coat is generally going to be in the garbage within a month, and I will never feel happy wearing it - that is why I still have my leather varsity jacket (which my mother hates). I can't afford a new coat that I like, so I would rather wear my 20-year old "vintage" coat than a Value City new coat. My mother understands this in theory. She always praises this thinking by telling me, "Yes, my father always said 'better to see one play than 10 movies.'" But she just doesn't really feel it. I guess we are both really cheap, but she is more "fun", and I am more stuffy. She doesn't-like-to-spend-a-lot, so she buys lots of little cheapo stuff. I a-lot-don't-like-to-spend, so I just don't spend.
So, here is the post I wrote last week, but never got to finish:
I think manic season has worn down, mostly due to physical limitations. The previous week of interstate, early-morning celebrations, return to dance class, and intense late-night beading, plus some kinda low-grade infection leading to flare-up of arthritis, has left me sore and tired. Whereas, I had a hard time getting to bed before 1am for the past couple weeks, I am now hurriedly slogging (now there's an oxymoron) through the dishes and abbreviated tidying to get in bed by 10pm.
And yet, I am in a very good place emotionally - very satisfied with what I have, where I am.
I was especially thinking about this today, as I tried to straighten before I left the apartment.
Apparently last week I didn't have any great desire for any stuff (although I really want to decorate, do plan to paint the walls, etc, but more on that later), and I actively thought about it as I looked around. But now I want. Even without a TV or newspapers, I saw the Black Friday ads, and I WANT.
So was this thought clear? Or do I just come off as an ungrateful snob? Or both?
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